Tom stayed over last night but now has gone off to work, so I've been up since 7:30.

I started thinking about high school for some reason, and how everything that happened had SO MUCH dramatic importance. I can remember in particular sometime in grade 11, when my friend Debbie and I were each fooling around with the other's boyfriend, neither one of us knowing that the other was doing the same. It's too bad we could not have just swapped, that might have removed the stigma of being bad girls, but then I wonder if it would have been nearly so fun. Once I started thinking about that, I started trying to pinpoint the moment in my life when all that drama stopped being the end all be all. I can't quite place it. I mean seriously, in my own head, I don't feel that much different than I did at 16. Sure, I have bills to pay, and mom doesn't buy the groceries and feed me; I have responsibilities I could not even have imagined at 16, but the thing is, I just feel like a 16 year old who happens to have to do things for herself. I guess as a teenager, I always expected there would be this magical moment that happened, presumably between the ages of 18 and 21, where everything including my thought processes became adult. I catch myself saying and doing things and think "I really can't see my mother being interested in/saying/doing this at 36", and then wonder why it even matters. I suppose some people would call it immaturity. I don't see it that way though. I am very capable of being mature when needed, I just don't like, no let's change that to I just refuse to become some boring ass stick in the mud who forgets what it's like to get excited about anything but a business trip, promotion, or pat on the back from big Bossy Bosserton.

On that note, I have to look up my latest Homies acquisition and see what his name is. I've almost got all of series 5.