Last night I dreamed I wrote a series of books including such titles as "How to Crash your plane... and Survive!" and it's landlocked companion "How to Crash your car...and Survive!" I know they were full of helpful tips, but I can't remember any of them now.


I think I'm a little obsessed with plane crashes.


You know, there is so much shit going on in the world, if you think about it, it can really make your insides hurt. As someone who is too lazy to stand for anything, I've pretty much adopted apathy, which is a little dated and very 90's of me, but whatever, I'm retro or something.


If you are mean to my cats, I will flatten you.