I contradict myself fairly frequently.

Normally the students don’t bother me, but lately it’s like dealing with a bunch of overgrown kindergarten children. These students are in their 20’s and up, but you’d never know it. I don’t know how they have managed to travel overseas on their own.

I’ve been existing without tv again, and it’s a tragedy! I’m not going to pretend I’m one of those people who are “too good” for tv because it’s corrupting and vapid and meaningless and I’m just too smart and humanity preoccupied to waste time on it (and really, most of those people just can’t afford tv and don’t want to admit it, at least I will admit it) because I don’t spend my time doing better things and I happen to like tv, even when I’m hating it, and the vapidity of it is what is so great, really.*

I do have about 4 books on the go right now… but sometimes you need some television.

Why am I fucking poor again?

*holy massive motherfucking run-on sentence.

this is what I come up with?

I suppose the problem is I feel completely creatively stifled, for whatever reason. I’m my own worst enemy, absolutely no confidence in anything I do, and having an awareness of it doesn’t make it any easier to overcome. Also, I’ve noticed lately that I have a really strong feeling of wanting to be alone, which kind of sucks.

I never wanted to be this office person. Really, I’ve ended up doing and becoming so many things that I never wanted to, and then I have the nerve to sit back and feel jealous about people who actually took chances to become the person that they really are. I disgust myself sometimes with my cowardice.

Pfft… I’m making myself sick with this pathetic ramble about being pathetic. If I wasn’t so lazy, I’d do something about it. But I AM lazy, clearly, do I just accept that? I guess I already have.

Korean Karaoke…. We have a great spot that serves after hours and lets you smoke inside. They also have the most extensively bizarre song selection I’ve ever seen in a Karaoke place. This keeps me sane, for now.

I have two cats who smell really bad and tear my condo to shreds. I am a slob on a massive scale… like I bet I am worse than most guys.

OK... this weekend, I will DEFINITELY take some pics. I hope I'm not lying.

Here's the thing. I am just too ridiculously lazy to write here regularly anymore, as you have probably noticed. I'll work on that. But right now... too lazy.